Archive for January, 2010
So Thursday evening I was feeling some pressure in my left ear, but this morning I woke up with undeniable pain, and a persistent stomping throb, or throbbing stomp, the unmistakable call of the wild ear infection. I was all, “What am I, four years old?” So I did what all reasonable four year-olds do and went crying to my mommy, who said, between large mouthfuls of her lunch, “An ear infection? Oh, stick a clove of garlic in there.”
“MOM. NO.”
“But I saw it on that Doctor Oz show! It’ll kill the – ”
“You always told me not to stick anything in my ears.” I paused. “Also, garlic?”
“It’s got antibacterial properties!”
“What if it gets stuck in there?”
“Well, at least it won’t get infected.”
Anyway, ear infections are usually viral, Mom, so just KNOCK IT OFF.
Anyway, though, I got to thinking about my usual cold/flu regimen, which goes like such:
1. Zinc cough drops (preferably cherry flavour)
2. Ibuprofen
3. Lots of whining
Not so much a standard home remedy as a standard drugstore remedy, unlike my crazy mother’s garlic advice. Then I was like, “But how crazy is it?” We don’t necessarily head ‘er to the drugstore for every little thing, we do subscribe to quite a lot of home remedies. Cranberry juice for urinary tract infections, ginger ale for motion sickness, toothpaste on a zit, toast with honey to cure a hangover. For all that we pride ourselves as being a modern bunch with the Better Living Through Chemistry and medicines done up in nice little foil packs, I think most of us would honest-to-Gob rather smear some baking soda on a beesting than drive to London Drugs for one of those Benadryl rub-on sticks. Am I right?
Readers, do you have any family/home remedies you swear by? (Or, in the case of hangover cures, at?)
In honour of Death Comes to Town (which I thought was great, by the way), here is my favourite KITH sketch:
I collect the movie stubs for every movie I see. I’ve done so ever since The Mummy on May 7th, 1999. I have no idea why that movie in particular sparked the habit, but whatever—it’s fun.
I think there’s only a few stubs that I’ve ever lost. Once was for Star Wars Episode One (of which I’m not too distraught over) because theatre employees collected our stubs at the cinema door. (Yes, that’s the stubs of the tickets they had already collected. Weirdos.) There’s also a James Bond movie missing because my parents bought the ticket for me one winter holiday and I had forgotten to ask for my ticket.
I’ve noticed that many of my stubs have started to fade. The one for the movie “Blue Streak” is illegible to the point where I can’t make out the date. Squinting at it made me feel old. I know, I know… 29-and-a-half isn’t very old at all, particularly when most people regard their 30s as their favourite years. But I feel cheated of the typical youth experience, having spent my teens and early twenties in the closet.
It was a different time then, mind you, and even negative experiences helped shape who I am now. Entering a third decade will be exciting; and although there’s stuff to mourn in the transition, I’ve got some stubs to remind me that there were good nights with good friends; it wasn’t all bad.
Do any of you collect these things too?
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